Posted by: carolg1849 | February 27, 2011

Losing it?

Well, thats if you had it in the first place?  What did she lose, when did she lose it?   Seems to me she has actually found something or is beginning to find, her true self.    Ruby Wax, a lady who back in the day was an all singing all dancing, full on confrontational interviewer of the rich and famous.

I have just watched her at the Chocolate Factory (  She still portrays that full on human dynamo,  her quick wit to the fore as she charts the effects of a crippling depression that took ahold of her at the peak of her success.  She admits this “depression” has been with her all her life and openly talks about her troubled childhood and how as a teenager not ever fitting into the mould of the blond and beautiful, tall with long “swishy” hair, she decided the only way to compete with them was to be FAMOUS.  How her strong will propelled her into stardom, and once that first hit of success coursed through her veins, how she wanted more and more, and the only way to fend of any glimpses of insecurities she kept “busy, busy, busy”.  Seems she could never stop, she ran so hard she totally ignored the signs of the downfall that was building up.  Then snap, it happened and instead of running she sunk into a crippling “depression” where all she wanted to do was stay in bed with thoughts of wanting to end it all.    Since that first “drop” into the abyss she has had several stays at the PRIORY, lucky for her I thought; each time gaining more understanding and inisght into the real Ruby beneath the mask, the Ruby who is rumoured to have Bi Polar but who when asked said no, she talks about being mentally ill?  she also talks of medication and how she believes she will be taking this permanantly for the rest of her life…………………..  and this is depression?

Is it possible that Ruby is actually describing a “personality disorder” a disorder that will be with her for life and that her delving into Mindfullness and John Kabat Zinn is helping her to find her centre and remain grounded and that the depression is a sympton of the disorder?

Is the stigma she openly talks about so severe that she cant associate with with the dirty word PD?  I take my hat off to her for trying to raise the stigma of mental health sufferers who she says 1 in 4 now suffer from, but the sector of our mental health system here in the UK that gets the worst deal of all  is personality disorder, for some they dont even get diagnosis at all because of the outmoded beliefs of   “professionals” who holds the  person as untreatable,   or they are  purposely given the diagnosis of Bi polar or some other “more accceptable” term,  so they can be medicated and seen to be helped but of course being medicated just dulls the senses, disconnects the person from their true feelings.  Feelings that would allow them, with help and the correct support, to understand and find ways of coping with them.

Seen as waste of space and a drain on the mental health system and treated with total disdain, many commit suicide. Its inhumane and a disgrace that the professioanls one turns to for help actually does not believe a word you are saying.   She describes the “walking dead” if ever there was a descripton of PD then this is it, to me you cannot talk about mental health without talking openly about the dirty word PD.  Funny really, she talks about how in the past you couldnt talk about being gay, then the C word, cancer could never be spoken.  Its the same for PD ,  this is the big elephant in the room that she is totally ignoring, come on Ruby get real !!!


  1. I think that the UK Mental Health professionals should start singing from the same hymn sheet. Treatment in the UK for Personality Disorders is very much a postcode lottery. In one area you may find MH professionals successfully treating Personality Disorders, and in another you will find MH professionals who still cling to beliefs that should have been long since condemned to antiquity – and these dinosuars routinely label personality disorders as being “untreatable”.

    In areas where Personality disorders are being successfully treated, both patients and their carers are filled with both hope and optimism, but in areas where the MH dinosuars practice, the patients with personality disorders and their carers face a professional callous indifference to their acute needs and their lives remain governed by overwhelming feelings of hopelessness, despair.

    • Lets find the ones who sing from the correct hymn sheet eh! Lets out the ones dare to sing at all.

  2. Is anyone else just totally exhausted with the fight…………..9 years later we find we are still sitting in front of professionals who are oblivious to PD, who still get away with extremely bad practise, who treat clients with little, if any respect. I am finding it increasingly difficult to continue to encourage my Daughter to engage with services, when the services continue to fail her, in fact I would go as far to say that the Services are making her more ill with their unprofessionalism, their unwillingness to engage properly, their de-valuing comments etc……… is it just us?
    I am so sick of hearing about ICP’s, best practise for PD, research and reports on how to engage with patients with BPD etc, yet the reality, for us, is that nothing has improved, the services continually let you down, is it worth continuing the fight? I am not willing to be brainwashed with NHS bumph on good practise until I start to see it in action! Perhaps we should have a dedicated site listing Good Practise from GPs, Psychiatrists, Psychologists, CPN’s etc… maybe then when we can point out good practise in action, will we be able to help make a difference to the care that our relatives receive, after all we all know what happens if we complain, it is turned back on us as being negative, difficult etc. Sorry for sounding off, I’m just so sick of ignorant, arrogant, egotistical so called professionals who think they know it all.

  3. Reblogged this on Random Spillages from a Reportedly Strange Mind and commented:
    Personality disorders are incomprehensible to most, unbelievably tough on those with them, and also the family and friends who support and care for us (THANKYOU sooooo much for stepping up where professionals fail. Please read the comments if you have a minute, Jenny’s post about ill treatment is sadly true and I cannot believe the professionals treating us are even allowed to accuse us of attention seeking and ‘faking it’, let alone refuse to give us the benefit of the doubt. I (and many others in the NORWICH area have been abused, mistreated, neglected, insulted, misdiagnosed, mis medicated, bullied, left for dead, let down and most of all…hurt. I am too traumatised to ever go back so I must fight my BPD by being my own therapist…I pray things change soon, and when i’m less angry I will re-blog lots of helpful articles. Get well soon world…Love Dawny xxx

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